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Dear Sugar
My sister has been married for about 5 years now. I recently moved in with them because of some issues I have with accommodation and I’ve been feeling quite uncomfortable. Ever since I’ve been here, her husband keeps comparing her with me. One time, I made a meal for everyone and he was extra excited that day, saying that my meals are way better than my sister’s. I stopped cooking from then. Sometimes he’s always giving this weird wink that I don’t understand. What should I do? I don’t know how to bring this up with my sister but I can tell she’s hurting.
Would love to hear from you soonest,
R
Dear R,
Truly, you're in quite a serious predicament, especially because her husband is making passes at you and hurting your sister with his snide remarks. You should hasten the accommodation process or better still, talk to a friend who can accommodate you for a while.
Even though you love your sister and would like to tell her, you should be aware that she already knows. It's up to her to decide to confront her husband or initiate this conversation with you. At the risk of not being seen as the enemy, don't bring up this issue. It will only make things a lot worse.
If you're planning on telling her still, make sure you've left the house before starting the conversation. In this case, consider confronting her husband first and make sure you have evidence (like a voice note) to show her. There are chances that false allegations will be made against you so you have to be prepared. If you choose to follow this route, be ready for anything, as a lot of people are not open to confronting the truth, even if they are your sister or your own blood.
Wish you all the best!
Love,
Sugar