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While this may not be the most romantic thing, setting boundaries go a long way to keeping your marriage. It may prove to be a difficult task, especially for newlyweds. However, realising that it takes both of you to make your marriage work will push you to have boundaries. For struggling newlyweds, we have created some suggestive ways that can help with setting the right boundaries.
- Figuring out emotions
One of the best ways to set boundaries is by understanding your spouse's emotions. Are there specific things happening within your marriage that affect his/her emotions negatively? Usually, these things may happen constantly, sometimes without the spouse noticing. However, it is quite rare to overlook once you have noticed. Since you're particular about the mental wellbeing of your partner, doing the right thing would be to start from setting boundaries for those factors or circumstances that fuel those emotions.
- Attention-sucking activities
Are there activities that draw your attention away from each other? Could it be a particularly bad habit that is choking you both? Figuring this out will help in setting the right boundaries at the right place. It will also allow you both to be more conscious and more considerate for each other's feelings.
- Friends and close relatives
Sometimes friends and close relatives can be a terrible distraction. In some cases, their activities cause a major drift in a marriage. Once you have figured out which family member or friend is causing this, it's time to set clear demarcations.
- No unprofessional Third parties
It's understandable for newlyweds to have disputes. However, it is a bad decision to get advice from friends. You should know that they would be biased and may support you even if you're wrong. Rather than letting close pals into your issues, work with a counsellor instead. Creating this boundary will avoid future intrusion or disrespect from your friends or family.
You would also be strengthening your relationship when you're both able go sort out differences without involving a third party.
- Clarity
Be as clear as possible. Make sure that your boundaries are noticeable. Communicate clearly and be open. Thrash our pending issues between you both and work together to figure out what boundaries work best for what. It will help you and your spouse make better decisions about boundaries. Additionally, it will boost the bond between both of you.