To be engaged is to experience a war of emotions while encountering different situations and testing your self-mastery. Here are some considerations to keep in mind after recovering from the shock of the rock on your left hand:
Repeating your proposal story
At first, you may not mind telling this story over and over again to close family and friends but when your parents bring their friends round, and a friend of a friend gets excited when she sees the rock, how will you react? Will you roll your eyes and play the excitement down or will you intimate them with the juicy details? Channel your inner Adesua Etomi and take twenty!
Knowing your partner
Do not assume that your future spouse will mysteriously change during this time. The ‘courting' phase is just a period that you are privileged to enter into deeper conversations and explore your partner's emotions on a level you may not have been privy to before.
Nerves and doubts
Cold feet? Are you questioning the desire to be engaged at this point in your relationship? Pre-wedding jitters may last for a short time before the wedding but now is the time to discern whether your feelings are really jitters and not second thoughts on the relationship itself.
Advice from third parties
It may seem as though everyone has an opinion on your engagement, when you should get married and how to go about planning your wedding. One word- IGNORE. It's best to keep calm in the face of ‘adversity' as you sit down and strategise with future bae first and gradually your immediate family and friends.
Managing overexcited friends and family
It's part of human nature to make assumptions and based on your current relationships; you may not intend to invite certain people to your wedding or even divulge ceremony details prematurely. You have to deal with such people knowing well that some disappointments may be made in the process. Let's face it, having an exclusive destination wedding won't work if you are inviting the whole of Lagos!
Juggling family vendors
Getting engaged in a family full of caterers, bakers, photographers and event planners may be a bother if you do not desire their services for your big day. If their services are not mature enough for your grand production, develop the art of subtle rejection without making them feel bad while encouraging them to perfect their craft.
Budget mode
Now is the best time to show love to your piggy bank or savings account in order to have funds left after your actual wedding day. Investing in business, stocks or treasury bills may even be a viable option so that you can get some juicy returns at the end of the year!
These are some pointers to keep in mind when understanding what it's REALLY like to get engaged. Take time out to mentally and emotionally prepare yourself for this season while you look forward to saying "I do."
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