"You should upgrade your tiny wedding ring so people know how successful you are!"
It was an offhand comment from a friend who meant no harm. But the more Rachel Pedersen thought about it, the more troubled she felt. Since when had her wedding ring, a token of lifelong commitment and gift from the love of her life, become a status symbol? And how many other women were feeling self-conscious about rocks that were less than Rockefeller?
Yes, I know that my wedding ring is small. Friends and family often ask me when I'm going to have it "upgraded".......
Posted by Rachel Pedersen on Thursday, February 4, 2016
For Pedersen, that "tiny" ring held extra-special meaning: She and her husband, Poul Pedersen, eloped 13 days after meeting in October 2013. Receiving any ring at all had been a happy surprise.
"Our story energizes people," the 27-year-old from Eden Prairie, Minnesota, told TODAY. "It reminds them what love is about. And to me, that ring is so much more than a diamond."
So Pedersen penned an essay and posted it to Facebook. More than 136,000 likes and nearly 39,000 shares later, it's safe to say her message has struck a chord.
More compelling to Pedersen than the post's popularity was the exchange that took place in the comments — specifically two things.
"First, many women were posting photos of their own rings, wanting their stories to be heard. To me, that showed a theme of physical possessions defining happiness, and a feeling of not being enough. I think a lot of women feel that.
Second, I saw women tagging their boyfriends, fiances, or husbands, saying, 'This reminds me of you.' And I saw the men responding. That was really beautiful — that this conversation had given them a reason to show their love and appreciation."
So what's the ideal comeback for ring-shamers?
"I like to say, 'It's a small ring, but a big love," Rachel said.