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Some weddings already fall under the category of a full-on theatre production so adding a tussle between in-laws in the mix makes things even more complicated.
In-laws may fight during the process of wedding planning because they don’t see eye-to-eye on certain things; they may have different preferences when it comes to social events and varying personalities.
Here are some top reasons why in-laws fight during wedding planning:
Your Mother-In-Law wants you to Wear Her Aso-Oke
Something old, something new and something borrowed; your mother-in-law is a huge believer of bonding through hand-me-downs and feels that you will honour her family as the daughter that she never had by wearing her wedding aso-oke while your mother is taking pride in buying that sparkly aso-oke by Shadiat from Instagram. The kind of questions that will follow are nothing short of: “Is it because it is old or it’s not reigning?”
Number of Guests
There’s really no party like a Yoruba party and if the in-laws are classed as high society, you know that the wedding is going to shut Lagos down. However, there may be cases where one side wishes to cater only to close family and friends while the other side is interested in inviting people from different church societies and secondary school groups.
Financial Prowess
The In-laws may want to compromise financially on certain aspects of wedding entertainment just so that they control it. Sometimes, the other side of the family may just allow them to have their way for peace to reign or a tussle occurs between the two sides. This could happen especially when it comes to booking different caterers for different groups of people or having special wedding favours reserved for only a select number of people. If you have certain preferences as a couple, here is the time to stand firm and show a united front on certain issues concerning the wedding planning because you only get married once.
Imbalanced Communication
Something as mere as information reaching one-side of the family before the other may ruffle some feathers. Make sure you pass across wedding planning messages at the same time. If one side of the family is in charge of a certain task, make them update all the stakeholders at the wedding at the same time in order to avoid a wordy fight.
It's Really Their Day
In this part of the world, the day doesn’t really belong to the couple, sometimes the parents take over fully and so do their individual agendas. This may influence the choice of the wedding band, the order of events and even food and drink vendors. It’s also time for the in-laws to play “my horse is bigger than yours”, hence, some friction may occur.
Are you ready to handle these in-laws? Remember what they say, when you marry someone, you marry their family too. Don’t be afraid to build new relationships and learn compromise before it’s too late!