Hello Sugar, I'm in need of dire help. Two days ago, a close friend of mine came to me asking for forgiveness, saying his conscience is judging him. I was clueless as to why he was asking for my forgiveness so I asked and he started narrating how he walked in on my brother and wife having sex on the eve of our wedding day, four years ago. Still in disbelief, I dismissed him right that instant saying he probably dint see what he thought he saw and that i trust my wife and brother.
During our courting years, I'm unavailable most times because of my job but ever since we got married, I've tried my best to be available when needed.
Honestly right now I'm clueless on what to do as we have two kids together already.
Dear Anonymous,
You must be going through a lot mentally right now. My heart goes out to you. This is doubly heartbreaking because it is a betrayal from not just one, but two people who are very close to you… if what your friend says is true.
Ask him if he can stand by what he said in front of the people he accused. If he’s sure of his story, he’ll be ready to defend it. Then talk to your brother and your wife separately, and in quick succession before they have the chance to talk to each other and come up with a matching story. If they deny it, involve the friend and see how they hold up against an eyewitness.
If it turns out your friend was lying or playing a trick, cut him off. But before you dismiss his story as a lie, ask yourself what he would stand to gain by telling a lie of this magnitude.
As for your brother and wife; if they really did this, it is a much harder decision. What if they never stopped? Think about whether you can actually continue a marriage with someone who could do this to you a day before your wedding. Can you get past it? Divorce is not easy, so think it through. Sometimes it’s for the best, other times it’s not. If your brother is guilty, it’s a wicked and inexcusable betrayal of his own brother. You may eventually forgive him because he’s family, but it will take a very long time to look past what he did.
You are going to need to stay away from both of them for a while, no matter what you decide. You have two children to think about so remember to make sure they are well taken care of physically and emotionally, no matter what happens.
I wish you the very best.
Sincerely,
Ms Sugar