Every marriage is different, but almost everyone dealing with a mother-in-law issue agree that they face the same dilemma.
In extreme cases, wives questions typically include; "how on earth can I get out of this?", "Is this ever going to stop?", "Do I need to leave my marriage?", "What exactly is the problem?" and more
It is a very tough place to be and even more challenging for your man who is not only clueless as to why there is a problem between you and his mum but, also always left to manage both two people he loves.
Furthermore, I need to emphasise that if you are not yet married and your future mother-in-law doesn’t like you or vice versa, please take a step back and objectively examine the situation. If nothing changes, is this something you can live with? Yes, they may start to like you, but it also very likely that things may be even more toxic after years in marriage.
All that being said, how do you build a blissful relationship with your future mother in law? Get ideas from the steps below:
- Plan your first visit. I can't stress this enough, do your homework on her and get a sense of who she is and her preferences. This isn’t to say you go pretending but darling! you want to put your best foot forward and make sure you don’t start any fire by negligence.
- Be slow to speak and quick to hear. Listen! Listen! Listen! That’s the only way you can help yourself have the right conversation because you would have heard her speak a lot that will guide you in expressing your thoughts the 'right' way.
- Don’t be too clingy to your husband when you are with her. Let your husband do the shielding and clinging because you don’t want her to think you are uncomfortable with her.
- If your husband is a 'mama's boy' chances are he tells his mother a fair amount of things you both discuss. Be mindful of what you say to him about her or his siblings. Even if he doesn't repeat your conversations, it's not a very good idea to speak about your in-laws in a negative light.
- Don't go 'Head to Head' with her. Find the most diplomatic way to communicate whatever hurt she has caused to your husband but don’t ever confront her, it NEVER ends well.
- Treat her as you would treat your mother (assuming you have a good relationship with your mum..lol). Don’t play defensive with her; just treat her as you would treat anyone you love.
And remember, you can never go wrong with silence. So please use a lot of it if you are not sure how to communicate.
Pic Source: Instagram / @banksbmpro