So you’re in love and your relationship is beginning to get serious, you should ask yourself these 11 questions that will really determine if your marriage will work.
1. Do you want children? How many would you prefer? What’s the age difference you would prefer between your children? You should also discuss the gender you would prefer even though it isn’t in your control. It’s also not too early to start discussing names.
2. What’s your idea of a good wife/ Good Husband? You’re coming from different backgrounds and you’re sure to have different ideas. Is your ideal wife supposed to clean and take care of the children only, or do you prefer a career woman. When discussing this remind him/her that you may not meet all the criteria of his/ideal partner but you are willing to try and come to an agreement.
3. What area would you prefer to live? Do you prefer a quiet estate, an enclosed house or you prefer an urban area with its buzzing noise?
4. Financials, who pays for what? Money issue has been recorded has one of the top reasons why couples break up. Make sure you know if they have any debt; car loans, student loan, mortgage you want to know it all. Also ask what your partner’s idea on joint account is.
5. How often would you want sex? Even if you’re having sex now things will certainly change within the confines of marriage. What are your dos and don’ts you’ll prefer within marriage?
6. What do you think of my family? Marriage is not just about both of you it’s also about your family, ask questions like what does my family do that annoys me? Do you have any reservations about my family? You may not be able to solve the issues you have with your family but simply pouring it out makes it a lot easier to deal with.
7. Are we at any point going to live apart? Are you ready to relocate with me if I get a new job? This is a difficult question you want to tackle now before you get faced with the situation.
8. Where do you draw the line between intimacy and personal space? As petty as this seems, it could cause a lot of problems in a marriage. Are you okay with me peeing in front of you, can I answer your phone calls and check your message?
9. How do you feel about me hanging out with my friends after marriage? Agreed you’ll have to tone down on all the night partying but to what extent? Are there Activities you’ll be upset if I did without you, for example going on a vacation without you?
10. How are we handling house chores? Are we going to have a house keeper help with cleaning? Do you mind if I get a cook or you would prefer your meals cooked by me only? Explain your preference on house chores.
11. Are they habits you dislike in your partner? Smoking, drinking etc. Are there some habits you can’t stand in your partner discuss all this.
Questions alone can’t really reveal all about a person, don’t expect to marry a perfect man/ woman they don’t exist. Love your partner and be committed to make this relationship work.